First let me say I love my engagement ring. It is beautiful and somehow reflects both my tastes and Catie's. She did a fantastic job picking it out. It is a round-cut 3/4 carat solitaire flanked by two 1/2 carat round rubies set in white gold. Catie choose rubies because she knew they are my favorite stone, and i'm not that big on diamonds. And white gold because I have weird skin sensitivities and yellow gold tends to irritate my skin. Maybe one of these days I'll get ambitious and start adding some pics to these posts and then you can all see it.
But I debated posting specifically about my ring because Catie told me right off the bat it was not a natural diamond. Although I was more than ok with that for 2 reasons. 1. I need to buy a car and we have to pay for wedding. We really don't have the cash to be spending ridiculous sums of money on a ring. 2. I wouldn't have wanted to wonder if my stone came from questionable origins, even the supposedly "conflict-free" canadian diamonds are anything but. Howver, my being ok with that and my being ok with telling the world "Yes, this is my ring and not every part of it is natural, although it sure damn looks like it," are two entirely different things.
Since I'm a curious person, I then couldn't help myself and felt the need to investigate the origins of my stone and holy crap, who knew there was such a shit storm of info and accusations flying from every corner of the industry over different types of man-made diamonds, or synthetic diamonds, or stones that are basically cubic zirconia just really really well done? For about 24 hours I felt confused and unsure about my ring. And guilty for feeling it. I had no idea what Catie had paid for it, and I didn't want her to have been ripped off. And I didn't want to say anything to hurt her feelings either. And she had gone to the trouble of special ordering it for me, because of the rubies, which I know she doesn't like doing. She is more a brick and mortar kind of shopper, especially with large purchases.
However, I also didn't want my concerns to eat away at me. So finally I said something to her, and flat out asked her what she paid. Armed with that knowledge I then I investigated similar prices for this sort of gem, with rubies and in white gold with similar settings. I felt much better after that because at least I knew she hadn't been ripped off, it was a fair price.
And aside from that, within 24 hours I'd come to another conclusion. This is a billion dollar industry. From Moissanite to Gemesis to Diamond Nexus to the diamond giant of De Beers to Asha to a whole host of other companies producing real or simulants or synthetics, there are billions to be lost and won. And De Beers in particular, who had the most to lose, has gone to great length it seems to discredit the other options.
In other words, I wouldn't pay attention to what any one has to say about any of them. If you like how it looks, and I do like how mine looks, that is really all that should matter.
Next: The search for a commitment ceremony venue continues.
Thanks for your comment on my site... glad that post and the comments helped you feel ok about your ring. It's been three years now since my husband and I sold my original diamond ring, put the money into our emergency fund and our HSA, and bought a ring from DNL. I still love my new ring, and it still looks great. I doubt I'll ever order from DNL again, because the only jewelery I wear is my wedding ring. But I would highly recommend them to other people. Congrats on your engagement!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Frugal Babe! Glad to know you are still loving your ring and that it still looks great three years later. I would recommend them to the budget conscious too. I'd recommend them to the not so budget conscious as well, but I doubt they'd listen.
ReplyDeleteI have a real diamond engagement ring, purchased when I was naive and inexperienced. Now, I wear a bezel-set CZ ring that won't catch on kids, clothes, bedspreads, and won't break anyone's heart if I lose it at the beach. My MIL put aside her real, but small, diamond and wears a larger CZ as her engagement ring, my newest SIL picked moissanite stone for the center of her engagement ring, and a friend also has a center stone of CZ surrounded by real, but smal, diamonds. There are tons of women who wear "not-natural" diamonds, it's just that they don't always advertise it.
ReplyDeleteWhile I understand your initial hesitancy (who wouldn't want a bling-bling/Zsa-Zsa Gabor ring in real life?), your ring sounds beautiful and personal.
maxymama -
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your stories of CZ :D I am sure there are MANY ladies out there who are sporting the CZ or the moissanite, or whatever, instead of the real thing. But you are right, they are embarrassed to say so. Which is part of why I posted this, because really, why should they be embarrassed to say so? Maybe if more of us step and say yes, I am wearing fake diamonds, and i'm proud of it dammit, fewer people will feel weird or whatever about it.
I really do love my ring. I never remember to put jewelry on in general, but I haven't forgotten this piece for one day yet. Although I feel bad for the other ruby ring I have, will it be tacky of me to sport two ruby rings on occasion? lol.