Wedding Update: The dress

It has been a really long time since I last updated. Almost two months. Sometimes it is hard to find the time and energy. Life has been full, with ups and downs. And it was always my intent to keep this blog sort of focused on the wedding (with an occasional spattering of politics) but it can be hard to write about these things when so much else is on my mind. But anyway...

I got my dress! I thought it would be a terribly traumatic event. But I looked online. I found a dress I liked at David's Bridal. I made an appointment. I went with Catie. I tried on 4 dresses.

Dress number 1 was HIDEOUS. White and frumpy and horrible.

Dress number 2 was my second favorite. I actually really liked it. And it looked decent on me. But it was A WEDDING DRESS. Super formal. And a whole lot of dress. Too much for what our day will be like.

Dress number 3 was my favorite from online. It is tea length, layered in lace with some touches of beading all over and a matching little bolero jacket. It is adorable. It is currently hanging in my spare room, awaiting a fitting in June. :D

Dress number 4 was sort of cool, but totally not me. It would be me if I was 45. And getting married for the second time. Catie said it made me look like a vampire, in a cool, sexy way I hope.

So in the end, not painful at all. But probably because I already knew what I want. If had gone in there with no idea what I wanted, it would not have been fun.

Also, I think it was good that I only brought Catie with me, who I instructed in advance to lie to me if she could tell I was in love with something she didn't really care for. When you already know what you want, the last thing you need is 3 or 4 different opinions about what you should get. And I'm really not a big fan of having lots of people focusing their attention on me. So my advice to all you brides-to-be out there - If having 4 or 5 people critique your taste is not your thing, don't feel like you have to bring a crowd with you. They will get over not coming with if you explain why you didn't want them there. And you can always do what I'm doing, invite them to a fitting and ask them to help you accessorize. Then they can still be a part of the experience in some way.

You can click on dress 2 and 3 to see what they look like. Although the models look better in both of them than I do. So keep that in mind when you see me in #3 on my wedding day! Sadly I couldn't find pictures of dress 1 and 4. Perhaps because #1 is too hideous to display online, it could scare customers off.

Now we just have to figure out what Catie is wearing. In case you were wondering, it definitely won't be a dress.

The Latter Day Bride?

Oh world. You mock me.

Whilst searching the internets far and wide for a dress with a high back I clicked on this link: www.latterdaybride.com.

Yes. Really.

And if you are wondering why I even clicked the link? Wouldn't you have done so? My curiosity overwhelmed me.

Now, being a lesbian, one wouldn't expect that I would go wedding dress shopping on a Latter Day website.

And to add to the irony, one wouldn't expect that a website devoted to dressing the very people who work so hard to keep my marriage illegal would be the only website, in all the vast internets, that has dress after dress on it that I like.

On the other hand. While then reading up on the LDS church and its views against gay marriage, I stumbled upon this website: Mormons for Marriage. Now, if you are like me, your automatic assumption would probably be that this is yet another website devoted to proclaiming why gay marriage is wrong. However, it is not. I was pleasantly surprised to discover it is actually a website for Mormons who support Marriage Equality. And a tiny amount of the bitterness in my soul was erased.

Now, I don't think it erases enough of the bitterness to actually let me buy a dress from the Latter Day Bride website. But still, it was nice to see.

As for the dress...I guess I shall continue my hopeless searching, until I break down and find a seamstress.

Plus Sized Bride

It's been a while, I know. The last days of summer have been busy for this Lesbian Bride and on Friday my partner and I are headed off on a 11 day road trip out east.

But that doesn't mean that wedding hasn't been on my mind. On the contrary. Among other activities, I've started looking for a dress.

I know. I know. The wedding is still a year away. However, having been attempting to clothe my body for the past 33 years, I am well aware of what a difficult task it is.

1. I am plus sized. Very plus sized. And while I certainly do plan on losing some weight before the big day. Even if I lose 50 lbs, I'm still going to be plus sized.

2. For personal reasons I need a high back. I don't mind exposing the ladies up front a bit, but my back needs to be mostly covered.

3. I want a cap sleeve if at all possible because I get hot easy, but am not super comfortable without anything on my arms/shoulders.

4. The dress does have to fit my tastes. Which aren't actually that picky, but I do have some preferences.

5. I don't have a big budget. But this isn't that hard of one to meet since I'm not necessarily looking for a super formal wedding dress. Just a dress a bit more special than I would usually wear.

Personally I don't think this is a very demanding list, but after looking at roughly 2000 dresses, and that is not an exaggeration, I have seen exactly one that might work. But since its viewed online on a skinny model and is nonrefundable if I buy it, its kind of hard to imagine shelling out a big chunk of change on something that I am just considering settling for because its the only one that is sort of ok.

Now don't worry. I have a year, so I'm not going to jump on this sort of ok dress just yet. My point just is, after looking at around 2000 dresses and only finding one that was sort of ok, I'm feeling like this is going to be sort of a hopeless task.

PS. If you were wondering. The hardest criteria from my list to mee is the #2. The high back. And that one is non-negotiable.